Tore myself away from my new Facebook addiction to inform my loyal readers about the issues of the day. According to the parenting listserve to which I subscribe, the issues of the day are how to keep squirrels from eating one's pumpkins, and the distressing news that the local mall pink slipped a favorite Santa Claus. Apparently, the guy had his own beard and has been delighting the kiddies for 18 years. He's even a carpenter during the off season, although no word on whether keeps elves. One mom lamented, "That Santa was particularly twinkly."
Upon reading the news, Miracle on 34th Street flashed through my mind and tears started to form (I've been very teary since weaning the kid, and that's my favorite Christmas movie).
Then I dug a little deeper. Turns out the mall broke Santa's contract because Santa and his real whiskers wanted $175 an hour this year. No wonder he was twinkly.
With the pumpkin problem solved (spray WD40 or blood meal to detract squirrels, or, as one woman suggested, you could always get your husband to shellac it), there is now a local campaign underway to bring back Santa. Did I mention that Santa hired a PR firm to aid his cause?
Is it too early for a holiday drink?